How to Ask Someone Out
Step 1: Bump into the person you fancy. Then drop your belongings and yell "YOU WANNA GO?!"
Step 2: Continuing yelling until the other person responds to something similar to "THEN LETS GO"
Step 3: Lightly push each other around a bit. **This fighting also give you the tiny opportunity to touch their chest**
Step 4: Yell "YOU WANNA GO-" then get down on one knee, hold their hand and end with "OUT?!"
Step 5: Success! If this doesn't succeed, honey they are not worth it
girl-with-gold-eyes:
wolfbad:
I want to write a story from the manic pixie dram girls point of view, about the annoying entitled ass who won’t stop whining and expects her to somehow save his soul despite the fact that she is barely is capable of saving herself.
you do this and i will rain all the hugs down upon you
All witches are selfish, the Queen had said. But Tiffany’s Third Thoughts said: Then turn selfishness into a weapon! Make all things yours! Make other lives and dreams and hopes yours! Protect them! Save them! Bring them into the sheepfold! Walk the gale for them! Keep away the wolf! My dreams! My brother! My family! My land! My world! How dare you try to take these things, because they are mine!
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Terry Pratchett (The Wee Free Men)
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voldemortandco:
zubat:
Blood is thicker than water but maple syrup is thicker than blood so technically pancakes are more important than family.
are you canadian
flatbear:
Faramuffins.
They’re like regular muffins, except they will NEVER BE AS GOOD AS THE FIRST BATCH YOU MADE.
The Five Worst Places to Vomit (x)
And yet it disturbs me to learn I have hurt someone unintentionally. I want all my hurts to be intentional.
You should not apologize for what you like to read. The person you are apologizing to can only fit into one of three categories:
1. He or she shares your joy.
2. He or she doesn’t give a good goddamn.
3. He or she thinks less of you for what you read in which case don’t apologize to that person because he or she is clearly a douchebag who doesn’t deserve your obeisance.
Number 1 requires no apology. Number 2 requires no apology. Number 3 neither requires nor deserves! an apology.
evilplotting:
On a scale of one to Kingdom Hearts, how unnecessarily complicated do you make things?
Mind you, sometimes the angels smoke, hiding it with their sleeves, and when the archangel comes, they throw the cigarettes away: that’s when you get shooting stars.
We gotta start teaching our daughters to be somebodies instead of somebody’s.
Don’t settle. Don’t finish crappy books. If you don’t like the menu, leave the restaurant. If you’re not on the right path, get off it.
Tell them stories. They need the truth. You must tell them true stories, and everything will be well, just tell them stories.”
That was all, and then she was gone. It was one of those moments when we suddenly recall a dream that we’ve unaccountably forgotten, and back in a flood comes all the emotion we felt in our sleep. It was the dream she’d tried to describe to Atal, the night picture; but as Mary tried to find it again, it dissolved and drifted apart, just as these presences did in the open air. The dream was gone.
All that was left was the sweetness of that feeling, and the injunction to tell them stories.
“
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Philip Pullman’s The Amber Spyglass (via rileyanne)
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